Death.
The eternal cycle of life and death.
The end of a singularity in one’s life.
It’s a concept so real and haunting that people fear the thought of taking their last breaths.
But you know, there’s a different kind of pain that comes with death. Or more specifically, something that comes with the pain of knowing someone you know or know of is gone.
The thing about death that makes everyone scared of it is the fact that it’s sudden. It can come to you anytime.
In your sleep, at a party, on the road.
It applies to everyone without discrimination and we all end up 6 feet under.
And don’t get me started on people who play God.
It’s a strange sensation that their physical form is still there in that coffin, but they won’t ever open their eyes or talk about their problems or laugh.
Remember that episode of Buffy when her mom dies and Anya breaks down because she just can’t grasp that it just happened?
That’s what I meant.
Today, I think I’ll talk about the immortality within the deceased.
A thing I like to believe in is how when people die, it’s ironically when they start to live forever.
Because for a lot of people, they take for granted or forget the ones they love and care about until they’re gone.
It weakens the heart.
About a few weeks ago, one of my Aunts who was battling cancer died.
I wasn’t especially close to her, but it was very strange to realize that someone who just threw a birthday party months ago has departed.
I didn’t expect to hear this news when my father picked me up from my condo that Friday night. I knew this person since I was a child and now I wasn’t ever going to hear anything about her ever again.
But you know, death is unfair sometimes. Unpredictable and Unfair.
Death takes people away too soon sometimes. A lot of times, they’re people who are kind and talented.
The effect on the people who are left behind to pick the pieces up varies from people to people.
Especially amongst fans of people who made an impact to communities they created. Like celebrities.
In a collective sense, there is shared grief between people who admired those who they didn’t know. It’s such a deep seated impact that you can’t believe you mourn for people you never really knew. And you know what? It’s especially heartbreaking to watch others mourn for their friends.
Take Edd Gould, creator of Eddsworld, for example. Beloved and one of the strings that brought a lot of people together. When he died, a lot of people cried for him. But none more among his friends than, at least I believe, Tomska. His death has had a lasting effect on Tom that it haunts his dreams to this day.
Monty Oum was, personally, devastating to me. He created Dead Fantasy and later on, RWBY. Both series I loved immensely. To learn that he’d died, I was almost sure it was just a sick joke.
But he was truly gone. You can see how things changed from RWBY onward. But the people of Rooster Teeth, amidst their grief, Kept Moving Forward. That’s what they would have wanted.
Nathan Wills…
If you’ve read my previous blogs, you’d know how much his suicide came out of nowhere and devastated a lot of his friends and family.
He was someone you never expected to be struggling with emotional turmoil.
And in his death, I’ve seen on youtube how much it hurt the people who kept him close to his heart.
Katers… Cory Williams… Sara Parker… His parents… His sister…
His fans…
I didn’t know of him for a long time, but he linger my thoughts a lot. Almost like an imaginary friend. And his music is so beautiful yet so haunting now.
With my Aunt’s recent death, it got me thinking about the last time I actually truly mourned.
I might sound cold, but when she died, my heart was solid enough to only offer my thoughts and prayers. I was sad, yes… But it didn’t break me.
The effect of this death had long since passed. It was so many years ago that sometimes I forget.
And there were some things I regret about this timeline that I didn’t offer a lot of information about what went down to anyone that asked.
So in writing this, I can at least immortalize that memory.
It was a night me and my family were coming home from a trip.
My father had just gotten a call. He was a little shocked and continued talking to the other person on the line.
This person, who had worked for us to make our home and took the time to care for me, had died.
This man was someone who played with me and didn’t mind spending his time with a child.
Things had started looking up for him. My father got him a job in Meralco and even had a wife.
And one trip to the beach ended with him saving a person from drowning and he himself drowning.
When my dad broke the news to us, I started sobbing. The car ride was silent away from my endless tears.
It couldn’t possibly be true. Not him.
I was just a kid. I didn’t know how death gave such an effect on people.
I lost grandparents and relatives I didn’t know or was never close with, and I never quite understood.
But he was young. He was a good person. He was my friend.
And he was gone.
He was dead.
I was never going to see him again. I was never going to play with him or talk to him. He was never going to see me grow up. He was never going to be able to start his family.
The part I regret about his death was…
I didn’t go this funeral.
I didn’t want to see him. Not like that. Not when he looked like he was just asleep.
I opted to stay home and drown myself in video games to get the thoughts out of my head.
And a few years later, I started to regret it.
Regret I never did get to say a proper goodbye.
Over time, the effect of his death started to fade and I wasn’t sad anymore. The pleasant memories were there. And at least he didn’t have to deal with the pains in life.
Here’s where I’ll end this post.
Remember that people will die.
Never forget to keep people close and don’t hold your tongue. Let them know how much they matter to you.
Or it’ll be too late.
The eternal cycle of life and death.
The end of a singularity in one’s life.
It’s a concept so real and haunting that people fear the thought of taking their last breaths.
But you know, there’s a different kind of pain that comes with death. Or more specifically, something that comes with the pain of knowing someone you know or know of is gone.
The thing about death that makes everyone scared of it is the fact that it’s sudden. It can come to you anytime.
In your sleep, at a party, on the road.
It applies to everyone without discrimination and we all end up 6 feet under.
And don’t get me started on people who play God.
It’s a strange sensation that their physical form is still there in that coffin, but they won’t ever open their eyes or talk about their problems or laugh.
Remember that episode of Buffy when her mom dies and Anya breaks down because she just can’t grasp that it just happened?
That’s what I meant.
Today, I think I’ll talk about the immortality within the deceased.
A thing I like to believe in is how when people die, it’s ironically when they start to live forever.
Because for a lot of people, they take for granted or forget the ones they love and care about until they’re gone.
It weakens the heart.
About a few weeks ago, one of my Aunts who was battling cancer died.
I wasn’t especially close to her, but it was very strange to realize that someone who just threw a birthday party months ago has departed.
I didn’t expect to hear this news when my father picked me up from my condo that Friday night. I knew this person since I was a child and now I wasn’t ever going to hear anything about her ever again.
But you know, death is unfair sometimes. Unpredictable and Unfair.
Death takes people away too soon sometimes. A lot of times, they’re people who are kind and talented.
The effect on the people who are left behind to pick the pieces up varies from people to people.
Especially amongst fans of people who made an impact to communities they created. Like celebrities.
In a collective sense, there is shared grief between people who admired those who they didn’t know. It’s such a deep seated impact that you can’t believe you mourn for people you never really knew. And you know what? It’s especially heartbreaking to watch others mourn for their friends.
Take Edd Gould, creator of Eddsworld, for example. Beloved and one of the strings that brought a lot of people together. When he died, a lot of people cried for him. But none more among his friends than, at least I believe, Tomska. His death has had a lasting effect on Tom that it haunts his dreams to this day.
Monty Oum was, personally, devastating to me. He created Dead Fantasy and later on, RWBY. Both series I loved immensely. To learn that he’d died, I was almost sure it was just a sick joke.
But he was truly gone. You can see how things changed from RWBY onward. But the people of Rooster Teeth, amidst their grief, Kept Moving Forward. That’s what they would have wanted.
Nathan Wills…
If you’ve read my previous blogs, you’d know how much his suicide came out of nowhere and devastated a lot of his friends and family.
He was someone you never expected to be struggling with emotional turmoil.
And in his death, I’ve seen on youtube how much it hurt the people who kept him close to his heart.
Katers… Cory Williams… Sara Parker… His parents… His sister…
His fans…
I didn’t know of him for a long time, but he linger my thoughts a lot. Almost like an imaginary friend. And his music is so beautiful yet so haunting now.
With my Aunt’s recent death, it got me thinking about the last time I actually truly mourned.
I might sound cold, but when she died, my heart was solid enough to only offer my thoughts and prayers. I was sad, yes… But it didn’t break me.
The effect of this death had long since passed. It was so many years ago that sometimes I forget.
And there were some things I regret about this timeline that I didn’t offer a lot of information about what went down to anyone that asked.
So in writing this, I can at least immortalize that memory.
It was a night me and my family were coming home from a trip.
My father had just gotten a call. He was a little shocked and continued talking to the other person on the line.
This person, who had worked for us to make our home and took the time to care for me, had died.
This man was someone who played with me and didn’t mind spending his time with a child.
Things had started looking up for him. My father got him a job in Meralco and even had a wife.
And one trip to the beach ended with him saving a person from drowning and he himself drowning.
When my dad broke the news to us, I started sobbing. The car ride was silent away from my endless tears.
It couldn’t possibly be true. Not him.
I was just a kid. I didn’t know how death gave such an effect on people.
I lost grandparents and relatives I didn’t know or was never close with, and I never quite understood.
But he was young. He was a good person. He was my friend.
And he was gone.
He was dead.
I was never going to see him again. I was never going to play with him or talk to him. He was never going to see me grow up. He was never going to be able to start his family.
The part I regret about his death was…
I didn’t go this funeral.
I didn’t want to see him. Not like that. Not when he looked like he was just asleep.
I opted to stay home and drown myself in video games to get the thoughts out of my head.
And a few years later, I started to regret it.
Regret I never did get to say a proper goodbye.
Over time, the effect of his death started to fade and I wasn’t sad anymore. The pleasant memories were there. And at least he didn’t have to deal with the pains in life.
Here’s where I’ll end this post.
Remember that people will die.
Never forget to keep people close and don’t hold your tongue. Let them know how much they matter to you.
Or it’ll be too late.
